the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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