just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
