Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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