i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
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