Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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