if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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