im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize