What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
just tell him i said nine months
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize