She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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