We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
