Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
