I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
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