On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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