I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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