Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
