My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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