My pussy is not your playground.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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