You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
