I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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