I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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