You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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