I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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