at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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