I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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