There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
