i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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