I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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