Ambien. No doubt about it.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
