Do vagina's smell?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Randomize