I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
