There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
