Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
