wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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