And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize