problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
