We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
