She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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