Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just want nice things and good sex
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
