Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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