Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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