The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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