worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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