i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
