We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
