Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
