no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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