maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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