doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
