you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
That was before I lit my hair on fire
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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