I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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